Film reviews

The horror is in the comedy.

The Lovely Bones
Peter Jackson reveals his childish imagination.

A Single Man
Tom Ford proves that there is more to him that Gucci and YSL whilst Colin Firth is simply brilliant.

Nelson Mandela and South African Rugby in Clint Eastwood’s stately film.

Two stand out performances in an averagely made but powerful film.

A Prophet
A brilliant French prison drama with real suspense and a lot of savoir faire. Magnifique.

The Road
The Road might sound depressing and bleak but it is a great movie and actually as uplifting and inspiring as any apocalyptic film can be.

What starts out as a great idea ends up as a bloody mess but only after some lively visuals and some witty games with the now trendy subject of vampires.

Whatever else you may think about this film, it has to be seen for its introduction of three-dimensional cinema.

Sherlock Holmes
It never takes itself too seriously but treats the original stories with respect… in short, it is a lot of fun.

Film Review of the decade
My favourite films from the last ten years. Let us hear your list too.

The following reviews were originally posted on, a leading online men’s magazine.

A Prarie Home Companion
The last movie from great film director Robert Altman, who died last year, is a fitting epitaph to an illustrious career.

Beer swilling, burping, pissing, throwing up and boob gazing – a typical night’s out with the lads but, just like those nights out, it does go on for much too long.

Black Book (Zwartboek)
Dutch director Paul Verhoeven who brought us the iconic Robocop and Basic Instinct but also rubbish like Showgirls returns to his roots and finds his form again.

American writer Truman Capote (Philip Seymour Hoffman) finds the idea for his next book when a newspaper reports the grizzly murders of an ordinary Kansas family.

Clerks II
So Dante and Randall are back – great news for all lovers of the original (and it was definitely original) movie.

Pass the sick bucket as Adam Sandler returns, farting and grimacing in this charmless and talentless rip-off of the great It’s A Wonderful Life.

Deck The Halls
It wouldn’t be Christmas without a turkey and you won’t find a bigger one than this in the current crop of festive releases.

Two wide-eyed American students, back-packing across Europe, are looking for fun with sex and drugs and Europop.

Inland Empire
Wildly imaginative to some, infuriating to others, surrealist David Lynch is back with his most uncompromising movie since Eraserhead.

When David (Alessandro Nivola) brings sophisticated Chicago new wife Madeleine (Embeth Davidtz) home to stay with his family in rural North Carolina, everyone is uncomfortable except David’s innocent and extrovert sister-in-law Ashley (Amy Adams).

Don’t tell anyone how this surreal psychological thriller ends! Hitchcock-inspired French director, Dominik Moll, presses all the right buttons.

Little Children
Look out for this one at next year’s award nominations. Outstanding writer/director Todd Field builds on his success with In The Bedroom to make one of the best films of the year.

London to Brighton
Pop Video director, Paul Andrew Williams, makes an impressive feature film debut in a homegrown gangster movie full of tension and style.

Memoirs Of A Geisha
“Chicago” director Rob Marshall gives the traditional world of the Japanese Geisha a Hollywood tweak and comes up with a glamourously filmed and acted movie that is as camp as Christmas.

Miami Vice
Michael Mann makes art from his hip 80’s TV series about the man with no socks.

Monster House
A scary animated movie for kids that gives them just what they love and it’s good fun for adults too.

Pan’s Labyrinth
This dark post Spanish Civil War movie – part animation and part real action – is a gripping study of cruelty and imagination.

Albert Pierrepoint (Timothy Spall) is Britain’s most notorious hangman priding himself on his speed and accuracy and carefully minimizing their suffering as he dispatches over 600 convicts between 1933 and 1955.

Pirates of the Caribbean – Dead Man’s Chest
No expense has been spared by Uncle Walt’s folk for Johnny Depp’s charismatic return as Captain Jack Sparrow in this funny and action packed sequel.

Jigsaw is back. The cruel gamester has devised some new tricks for his latest victims. Will they survive the test? Can the filmmakers spin it out one last time? We dare you to take a look!

Spider-Man 3
It’s slick, funny and spectacular and, for a change, here’s a super hero sequel that doesn’t take itself too seriously.

Superman Returns
Marlon Brando returns from the grave (actually from Superman 1’s cutting room floor) for a few more seconds as Superman Senior and spanking new Brandon Routh inherits those famous y-fronts.

Thank You For Smoking
The witty film of a wittier book has some cracking performances, some great lines but a sentimental under-belly.

The Da Vinci Code
After all the hype it’s really just a fun adventure movie let down by the mystic crap. Nice American guy and attractive French chick on the trail of the Holy Grail with a host of bad guys in chase.

The Departed
So is this Scorsese’s great film for this decade? It has most of the ingredients of his finest work – the violent world of gangsters, cops, and assorted American low life on that narrow line that separates the good guys from the bad ones.

The Fountain
Loved by some and hated by a whole lot of others, Darren Aronofsky’s latest movie is every bit as weird and, some would say, wonderful, as his previous highly original movies, Pi and Requiem for a Dream.

The Good Shepherd
Director Robert De Niro’s film is long and slow but, if you give it a chance, it brings its own rewards.

The History Boys
Brilliant theatre director Nicholas Hytner might run the National Theatre but he just doesn’t get it about filmmaking.

The Lake House
Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock, the stars of Speed, are reunited but there’s nothing fast or exciting about this ponderous pen-pal movie.

The Last Kiss
Scrubs star Zach Braff does what he does best in this enjoyable remake of an award-winning Italian film from a couple of years ago.

The Omen
This re-make of the 70’s classic is just a pale imitation so if you’ve seen the original there’s no need to catch this one.

The Science of Sleep
The director of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind shows us his imagination in this highly original new movie but he also tries our patience with a plot that gets lost somewhere along the way.

The Wicker Man
Who would believe that they could do a remake with the brilliant Nicolas Cage and still turn out a turkey? Well, as the old joke goes, Edward Woodward would.

The Wind That Shakes The Barley
Veteran director Ken Loach won the top prize at this year’s Cannes Film Festival for a moving and powerful film about Ireland’s fight for independence.

The little green turtles were fun in the Eighties and Nineties but their 21st Century reinvention, in so-so animation, is just plain dull.

Bree, formerly Stanley (Felicity Huffman) is a week from her gender realignment operation when she discovers that she has a 17-year-old son, Toby (Kevin Zegers) a rent boy in trouble with the law.

With this tragic-comedy, the great Spanish director Pedro Almodóvar wowed the Cannes Film Festival. Penélope Cruz, in the performance of her career, will wow everyone everywhere and not just with the brilliance of her acting.

Richard E. Grant directs a cast of luvvies in this sentimental portrait of his childhood.

When A Stranger Calls
This 70’s remake is Scary Movie without the laughs but go for it if you like your slash flicks fast and familiar.

X-Men: The Last Stand
The Mutants are under threat again from those dastardly humans who have found a “cure” for mutancy that can be administered voluntarily by syringe or violently by a gun.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.