It was all a terrible mistake! Honestly, it wasn’t deliberate. I was just trimming my beard, as you do…. then the unspeakable happened. I’d got the wrong setting on the razor and, in one fell swoop, all the beard on one half of my face had gone. I had no choice, honest governor. I had to shave the whole beard off.
The horror was obvious every where I went. Oh no! People screamed, begging me to grow it again. You look awful without a beard, a friend said. A friend? Well, the point was made. So, over the last couple of weeks i’ve been letting it grow. Treat this, if you want, like a natural history programme. You can follow the beard’s progress and see how Im getting on.